{"id":383,"date":"2011-05-16T15:07:51","date_gmt":"2011-05-16T15:07:51","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/?p=383"},"modified":"2011-05-16T15:07:51","modified_gmt":"2011-05-16T15:07:51","slug":"my-neediness","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/?p=383","title":{"rendered":"My Neediness"},"content":{"rendered":"

I need God desperately.<\/p>\n

I need him more than food. <\/p>\n

I need him more than shelter.<\/p>\n

I need him more than clothing.<\/p>\n

I need him more than I need my wife.<\/p>\n

I need him more than I need my kids.<\/p>\n

I need him more than I need my friends.<\/p>\n

I need him more than I need my church.<\/p>\n

I need him more than I need meaningful work.<\/p>\n

I need him more than I need a steady income.<\/p>\n

I need him more than good self esteem.<\/p>\n

I need him more than his answers.<\/p>\n

I need him more than his religion.<\/p>\n

I need him more than his calling.<\/p>\n

I need him more than his gifts.<\/p>\n

I need him more than wisdom.<\/p>\n

I need him more than rest.<\/p>\n

I need him more than life.<\/p>\n

This kind of neediness is only life-giving when directed at God. If I put it on anything or anyone else, I find myself stressed, frustrated, burned out, overwhelmed, over-performing, striving, impressing, defensive, attacking, resenting, escaping, hiding, sleeping, and altogether void of joy. But when I willingly and eagerly direct it at God, humility rushes in, and life fully shows up. <\/p>\n

\"neediness\"<\/a>I find myself strong.<\/p>\n

I find myself peaceful.<\/p>\n

I find myself awake.<\/p>\n

I find myself glad.<\/p>\n

I find myself grateful.<\/p>\n

I find myself amazed.<\/p>\n

I find myself loving.<\/p>\n

I find myself fully alive.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

The way Jesus said it was, \u201cBlessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

And the way I understand it is, \u201cAdvantaged are those who know and live in their neediness for God, for they will experience the fullness, invulnerability, and adventure of heart that they are longing for.\u201d<\/em> <\/p>\n<\/p>\n<\/p>\n<\/p>\n

What do you think you need more than God?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I need God desperately. I need him more than food. I need him more than shelter. I need him more than clothing. I need him more than I need my wife. I need him more than I need my kids. I need him more than I need my friends. I need him more than I […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_s2mail":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[6,4,7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-383","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-christ-vs-church","category-discipleship","category-the-best-life"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pO6nf-6b","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/383"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=383"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/383\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=383"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=383"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=383"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}