{"id":108,"date":"2007-07-18T16:33:00","date_gmt":"2007-07-18T16:33:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/brianmashburn.net\/?p=108"},"modified":"2007-07-18T16:33:00","modified_gmt":"2007-07-18T16:33:00","slug":"lament-for-conner-and-all-of-us","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/?p=108","title":{"rendered":"Lament for Conner…and all of us"},"content":{"rendered":"
A while back I wrote about my friend who suddenly lost his middle school son in a car wreck that the whole family was in. Below is a gut wrenching piece from him that reflects the depths of both suffering and faith available to us as men. Don’t read it if you expect fluffy platitudes about life with God.<\/span><\/font><\/div>\n
<\/span><\/font> <\/div>\n
<\/p>\n
\n

Lament For Connor<\/em><\/strong><\/font><\/p>\n

<\/font><\/em> <\/p>\n

That ugly scar of fresh turned earth<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

Holds tight my broken son whose worth <\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

The world will never know. And I <\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

Turn stricken face to steely sky <\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

And ask a question that will start <\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

Fresh groaning from a broken heart .<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

<\/font><\/em> <\/p>\n

<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

Where were you, God, on that dark road<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

When violence took what I adored <\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

And crushed him? Did You see her shock,<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

Her wailing, kissing bloody locks?<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

Did You stand by with folded arm <\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

Or with Your finger cause this harm?<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

<\/font><\/em> <\/p>\n

<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

What did I do to make you mad?<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

If this is love I’ve more than had<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

Enough. How can I speak of You <\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

To foes when this is what you do<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

To friends? I’m worn out now and just<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

Begun to walk the path I must.<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

<\/font><\/em> <\/p>\n

<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

Yet I have nowhere left to turn<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

For hope or joy. I cannot learn<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

Another voice than first I knew <\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

And trusted. Were they true,<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

The promises you made to me?<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

Can I full trust what I can’t see? <\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

<\/font><\/em> <\/p>\n

<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

I know that my Redeemer lives.<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

I know a Sovereign takes and gives.<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

I am a blind and broken man, <\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

So I will hold on while I can<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

For now. <\/span>Is grace enough to keep? <\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

Until we see Your face, I weep.<\/font><\/em><\/p>\n

<\/font><\/p>\n

<\/font> <\/p>\n

I’m eternally grateful to my friend Tod for sharing his suffering. For those of us who know him, we know him to have a gift of insight and truth. That he continues to apply those gifts regardless of the circumstances of his life doesn’t surprise me at all. He has been chosen from among us to be an exhibit of God’s glory, and I mourn with him that it is in such dramatic fashion. Blessed are the people who have been chosen for lesser shows, and count it only God’s grace if you are one them, created for the lesser trials and displays. Only give yourself over to the pain of others so that you can better know God’s love and consolation through them, and they through you.<\/font><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/font><\/span> <\/p>\n

Jesus said that his yoke is easy and his burden is light, and that it is for those who are weary and heavy laden. How easy it is to believe such a claim when all is light and airy around us, our outward circumstances providing us with ease. But finding his deeper meaning can only come with the shadow’s descent, the dark clouds hovering, the very ground under feet pulled away. <\/font><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/font><\/span> <\/p>\n

Pray for my friend that, he find it. He will.<\/font><\/span><\/p>\n

<\/font><\/span> <\/p>\n

<\/font><\/span> <\/p>\n<\/div>\n

<\/span><\/font><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

A while back I wrote about my friend who suddenly lost his middle school son in a car wreck that the whole family was in. Below is a gut wrenching piece from him that reflects the depths of both suffering and faith available to us as men. Don’t read it if you expect fluffy platitudes about […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_s2mail":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-108","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pO6nf-1K","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/108"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=108"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/108\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=108"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=108"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.brianmashburn.net\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=108"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}