My Neediness

I need God desperately.

I need him more than food.

I need him more than shelter.

I need him more than clothing.

I need him more than I need my wife.

I need him more than I need my kids.

I need him more than I need my friends.

I need him more than I need my church.

I need him more than I need meaningful work.

I need him more than I need a steady income.

I need him more than good self esteem.

I need him more than his answers.

I need him more than his religion.

I need him more than his calling.

I need him more than his gifts.

I need him more than wisdom.

I need him more than rest.

I need him more than life.

This kind of neediness is only life-giving when directed at God. If I put it on anything or anyone else, I find myself stressed, frustrated, burned out, overwhelmed, over-performing, striving, impressing, defensive, attacking, resenting, escaping, hiding, sleeping, and altogether void of joy. But when I willingly and eagerly direct it at God, humility rushes in, and life fully shows up.

needinessI find myself strong.

I find myself peaceful.

I find myself awake.

I find myself glad.

I find myself grateful.

I find myself amazed.

I find myself loving.

I find myself fully alive.

 

The way Jesus said it was, “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”

And the way I understand it is, “Advantaged are those who know and live in their neediness for God, for they will experience the fullness, invulnerability, and adventure of heart that they are longing for.” 

What do you think you need more than God?

Christ vs. Church, Discipleship, The Best Life

5 Comments to “My Neediness”

  1. Wow. I feel the need to comment on these lists, but I’m not sure what words to use. Perhaps “Amen” is enough? Great thought-provoking post, Brian. It makes me very glad I’m needy for Him.

  2. I don’t think I need anything more than God. At least not in my head. And during those times, you know like in 2008 or so, when everything has been stripped away I am made to fully realize that there is nothing I need more than God. However, in my day to day life, I struggle with living that way and remembering it. And yet, in those brief moments when I do live that way, you are right – strong, peaceful, awake, glad, grateful, amazed, and fully alive – is exactly how I feel. And I long to live there more and more often.

  3. I’m with Ginger. Easy to intellectually know it and be so amazed by the irony and beauty of the reality of what’s stated in your post. However, so easy to get “lost” in all that is found in our earthly, flesh-filled existence.

  4. […] human and what do we humans need in relation to God? I think Brian Mashburn’s post entitled My Neediness is one of his best … and that’s saying a […]

  5. […] Brian Mashburn addresses his Neediness … and invites us to join him in needing God. […]

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